Been MIA and now I am back in action...kinda

Uphill Battle or Just Getting Started?

 

 

So here I was doing 5Ks, running daily, working out all the time and feeling great...and then I wasn't.  I went into a depression because I figured no more getting in shape for me, no more running...no more. Boo hoo poor me....you get it.

 

 

Then Emmie reminded me who I was...I was a fighter.   I looked down at the recent extra weight on my body, felt the reminder from my muscles they were out of shape and cried.   I actually cried a lot that week.  I am not a person who cries a lot. I cried my heart out and some days it was ugly crying. You know the kind I mean.  The kind that no matter how cute you are, you look like some deformed alien.  Then I moved on.

 

 

Today is the day I AM moving on in reality not just emotionally.  So today I start again. Can I run right now? Nope. Will I run again? YES!!!!! This was my original goal, to document my journey. Well the journey has changed. That is okay.  So as the song says "I'm a survivor!"  This is not an uphill battle, just a challenge that I WILL complete. So here we go!

 

Melissa

Listen to your body

I feel under the weather.  My glands are swollen, I have a small fever and my body just aches.  I want nothing more then to curl up and rest.  I wanted to run tonight and kick up the distance just a bit after my return from injury.  I wanted to increase my pace tonight as well.  This is just not happening (enter pouty face and crossed arms). 

I have a 5K planned this weekend and I had to accept that it just may not be happening.  What I am slowly learning through this journey, is that it is important to gain health but it is equally important to listen to our bodies.  If I push through this and try to "sweat it out" I could end up sicker. 

I feel more like stomping my foot and blowing into a full blown temper tantrum that any toddler would be proud of.  Instead I will go home, take care of the family and curl up to take care of ME.  It is far more important to rest today so I can run further.  By pushing myself I may end up sicker, as mentioned before or with yet another injury. 

So fully against what I WANT to do and regretfully accepting I must relax, I am listening to my body. I hear it loud and clear.  Do you ever have trouble listening to your body when it is worn down?

Running Sucks!





Running sucks. I hate running! Why did I decide to do this? Do I really care about decreasing my pace? Do I really want to run that many miles? Who do I think I am anyways?

This is the conversation my brain has with my body for the first mile of every single run. Eighteen months in and it is still the same conversation. On the second mile my brain ups the ante a little. You are tired. Your left pinky toe feels a little squished.  You should be doing (insert random to-do list items here). Mile three is more like- You look silly. You are running too slowly. You aren’t going to make your mile goal today so you should walk. By the third mile my brain realizes my body is still in motion and it does this wonderful, magic thing. It shuts up. I stop trying to talk myself out of running and start enjoying the things around me. The sights, the sounds, the smells become my focus. I start to admire a lot of the world that I miss as I make my way through the tasks of an ordinary day.  Things that I take for granted, or look over, regain their wonder and magic. And it does not matter where I am running. Everywhere has these wonderful amazing things I usually miss because my brain never shuts up long enough for me to pay attention to them. At this point I start talking to God- Thank you for that majestic Hawk. Thank for the light rain to cool me off. Thank you for ______.  I find such peace as I become full of gratitude.  And that happens every time I make it past that 3 mile mark, no matter what challenges I am facing in Life. That is why I am passionate about running. Yes, I like the ways it has changed my body. Yes, I adore the positive, health conscious people I have met. But I crave the way a Run allows me peace, offers me clarity, centers my thoughts, and soothes my soul.

Sounds silly? I thought so too before I became a runner.

Injury Free and Full of Fear

There is no greater feeling when you realize you are no longer injured and can finally lace up your sneakers again.  There is no greater feeling, however, with this came fear for me.  I was concerned that if ran wrong, tripped and/or fell I would end up sidelined again for another few weeks.  

A few weeks ago, while running in the woods with friends I encountered a moose.  I was so startled that I hurt my knee.  I watched it change colors, swell up and felt it aching.  I do not know what was worse, the pain that I swore to everyone was non-existent or the fact I couldn't join the other runners outside.  It was a long few weeks and a few weeks that I was whining to Emmie.  Thank you, Em for putting up with me.  

I headed out tonight, much later than planned. I put up off something that I loved out of fear.  Fear is a very interesting emotion.  You realize it is irrational and yet you cannot move past it without really setting your mind to it.  I set out tonight and felt the wind gently on my skin.  I took note of the neighbors cutting their grass.  I noticed the chirping of the birds and the sun slowly setting around me.  

Before I knew it I had gotten into my rhythm again.  My feet hit the pavement in their same familiar way.  My breathing became regular and my knee felt amazing.  I was back.  It had been a very long few weeks, but I was back.  I pushed the little voice in my head away that told me to be careful and I fully relished in my run.  I was a runner again. 

Emmie and I have discussed why we have challenges put in front of us when trying to achieve a dream/goal.  Em believes that when you really want something we are challenged to see how bad we really want it. I think she is onto something.  So how bad do I want it? I will be hitting the pavement again tomorrow with fear a distant memory and nothing but my goal in front of me.  

Don't have Haters? You really do not know what you are missing! 

I am tempted to insert something deep & meaningful here, but my tendency towards blunt honesty will not allow it. The sad truth is that people do not tend to delight in our Successes the way we dream of....even people who you are sure care about you and want the best for you may sometimes surprise you. Should you Hate them? Live out the remainder of your days isolated from such negativity in the caves of Timbuktu? 

NO! - and if for no other reason then that you will be giving the Haters exactly what they want! Instead thank them. Then harness that energy- whatever that is for you (anger, disappointment, sadness) and transform THAT into the fuel you need to make your wildest dreams come true! And when you succeed- be sure to Thank your Haters. (It is important to give credit where credit is due, besides it will drive them insane!)

Do yourself a favor and teach yourself this skill now! You are not in Kindergarten & this is no Little House on The Prairie!  No-one gets a gold star for pretending they believe you can accomplish grand things. In fact, when you declare to yourself and the World that you are about to make huge Life changes- people are going to laugh. (if you are lucky, you will be one of them!) Let them laugh- the Universe won't be laughing, it will be shoring up resources to meet you at the Inner Strength that is YOU. Use this and your belief in what you are made of to Power you to Success.

I have become so adept at this that these days I find it difficult to achieve Grand Schemes in the absence of My Haters. ( I now understand the War Cry "where My Hater's At?") Our relationship has become symbiotic. Without their mocking I start to question if my Grand Schemes are somehow too realistic or easily attainable. And because Gratitude is good for the Soul- why not start out the day with a heartfelt Thank You to your Haters? No need for names (oh, they know who they are). 

From Huffing & Puffing to Peace

A few years ago, if you had told me I would be a runner, I would have laughed at you.  I run very slow, I look like a goof ball, but I run. Therefore, I am proud to call myself a runner.  What I have discovered so far in just the few months, is that runners will welcome you into their little club with open arms. 

After a visit with my sister, Andrea Desmarais and her husband Justin I decided I wanted to run.  Justin told me he had completed some 5Ks and I would be surprised at what I was capable of.  He put a fire in my soul for running that I thought I might want to really try this.  I decided I wanted to run and so I reached out to Emmie Moore and asked her to help me to do this on a more serious level.  What I received for a response was a very loving "Of course!". 

When I started to run or let's be honest, barely move on my first run/walk; I thought I was crazy for trying this.  My lungs ached, old injuries flared up and I couldn't understand what my dear friends Emmie, Janel Morrow, Amanda Burr and Christopher Naper saw in this insanity.  The next day though I ran again.  I kept running for the rest of the week.  Did it look any prettier? No.  I am pretty sure there was nothing grand in my attempt at running that first week. 

Then something strange happened, I had to take a rest day.  My husband, Richard who used to run was pretty adamant about it.  I missed running. I looked longingly at my running sneakers and was actually pretty sad I couldn't lace them up.  When I shared this I was informed, I was a runner. It was a simple as that.  I had become one of those crazy people who you see running, for fun. 

The next day when I was able to run again, I ran as soon as I woke up.  I could not wait to be back out.  I felt a peace and joy flood over me as I started off.  Soon I became one with my feet hitting the pavement and SOJA flowing through my headphones.  I could not get enough of it.  There were moments I had to walk, and was told by so many people that is okay.  All my running friends kept saying to go at my own pace, there is no right or wrong way to run.  I learned there were so many other of my friends who ran that I didn't even realize at the time.  So a huge shout out to those not mentioned yet Jennifer Cayer, Chelsea Martin, Sarah Gerlack, Tammy Perry, Lisa Parker, Christie McDermott, Danielle Pease-Goodson and Andy Illes.

I ran my first 5K in June of this year.  I huffed, I puffed but I made it across the finish line.  Was it pretty? No.  Was I in the top runners? No. I was in the back of the pack.  But I did it.  My friend Amanda was there to cheer me across the finish line she had crossed over twenty minutes before me.  She was all full of love and pride.  As I was crossing it I could hear the cheers of fellow runners. I cannot tell you how sweet it is to hear all of those strangers gathered together for a common goal and ready to welcome a very beginner runner into their group.  I kept hearing cheers as more and more people crossed.  When the final person crossed the finish line, she was cheered on like she was in first place.  I decided these were the kind of people, I wanted to surround myself with.  

A month later I ran/walked in a 5K with my son.  My son has Aspergers and other challenges.  For him to complete this, even very slowly, was AMAZING. I cannot tell you the joy he felt as he crossed the finish line.  He now wasn't a child labeled he was a child just being a child and completing a goal. 

For me and my son, running has transformed our life.  I am still chubby, still not able to keep up with the front of the pack or even the middle, but I run.  We have set a goal to run the Houston Half Marathon in 2016.  I would love to have many people do this with us.  If you want to join us, let us know! We will have our Facebook Page up soon where you can follow this journey.  I am so thankful I have people to share in this journey with.   We are running for two special little boys Jacob & Tosh and we will introduce you more to them in the coming weeks. 

We hope you enjoy this journey with us and perhaps you will want to start your own. 

Melissa

The Secret Benefit of Running

It was about two years ago now that I decided to become a Runner. It really was like what people describe- I woke up and just decided. It is not unlike me to come up with ‘grand schemes’ (the term of endearment I have given to describe the ridiculously high goals or crazy plans I come up with).  But at 37, having zero athletic history, 170 something pounds crammed onto 5’2”, and having invested most of my free time for the previous decade attempting to perfect the fine art of Couch Potato-dom; this was outrageous even for me. That first day I intended to run a mile. I was winded by the time I got to the end of my driveway. I walked for a bit and then saw a light post up ahead. Certainly I could run all the way there? I did, and then I about collapsed. I walked a few more feet, with the intention of alternating walking & jogging very slowly; didn’t happen. What did happen is that I walked very slowly around the block, and then retreated to the comfort of my couch & drowned my defeat in my favorite ego elixir Doritos. I would declare to people, “I am going to be a Runner,” and then tell the story of my very first run. People laughed, and I re-grouped.

Several times in the year long journey to my goal of running a Half Marathon, I thought to myself- I should document what is happening to me. Many people noticed changes in me. Physical changes, increased confidence, and such. Those things are great benefits. I enjoy them very much, truly I do, but it is not those changes that I wish I had captured. It is the spiritual transformation that has been the biggest gift Running has given me. I do not understand why people do not talk about that more. 

Running changes your Life. Forever.

So, when my dear friend asked me to help her become a Runner, I was thrilled. It is exciting to be asked to be a part of someone setting and reaching fitness goals. But I knew a secret about Running. I knew this process was going to change her Life in deep and profound ways. To be able to be a part of that, to be able to watch that unfold, is such an honor and a gift.

We want to share this amazing process with you.

We want to inspire you.

We want to remind you of your own Greatness.

So follow along. Read. Watch. Share in the joys and challenges of this amazing journey with us.